Perspectives

It wasn't my idea to spend 24 of my last 48-60 hours in Mexico in the hospital.  but looking back I am so thankful for that time.  You see, my body tried to pass a kidney stone the thursday before we were to leave Sunday morning the last of July.  After about 3 hours of pain that went  from horrible to unbearable, I found myself at the ER of our local hospital in Monterrey.  Although the story is funny, I really wanna focus on what God did.  As I looked out my room after having a procedure to decrease the size and them tons of antibiotics to fight the infection in my kidney, I was arguing with God about the plans that I had to meet with people. That He had really messed this up for me.  After hours of moping and much prayer.  I felt that God was showing me that with him I can endure much pain.  He reminded me of the well wishes and advise I had been giving by many of my friends in Mexico.  Many had told me, "You are stronger than you think you are."  This seemed an odd thing to say to me I felt as I was leaving.  What does that mean?  I am stronger than I think I am?  Hmmmm.  Then as I was literally rolling around the floor in my bathroom, bedroom and bed.  I remember asking my husband to read the Psalms to me.  I remember crying out in pain and desperation for Jesus to take away my pain, for Him to comfort me and for Him to get me through it all.  I was in so much pain that periodically I found myself vomiting.  Those of you who have had a kidney stone know what I mean.  As I was whining in that hospital bed, I heard God echo those words spoken by so many of my friends.  "Cathy, WITH ME, you are stronger than you think."  Wow,  God was giving me perspective that seemed so much more mature that I really am.  I remember thinking, " Ok, Lord, if this is what you had in mind for me for my last day or so.  So be it."  However I did talk the Dr. into letting me out the next day and start on an oral antibiotic and come back to his office to get my cath out.
In just over a week, we will have been in the states for 3 months.  No one could have prepared me for all the pain, grieving, and struggles we have endured.  To some it may seem like nothing as there are always someone worse than you, I know.  But Jesus continues to sustain us and give us what we need. If I choose to see it, God gives me the perspective to see what he is doing, so that instead of whining about what should be, I can grasp what is.  I can't tell you why I had a kidney stone two days before we were to leave Mx.  I can't tell you why things are happening in our lives as they are.  Perhaps you are struggling understanding things in your own life.  I wanna encourage you, like my friends did me,
 "In JESUS, you are stronger than you think!"